Author Leanne Power will be signing copies of “You Are Sooooo Beautiful” at:

Chapters Southpoint Location

Chapters – South Point
3227 Calgary Trail NW
Edmonton, Alberta T6J 5X8
Canada
(780)431-9694

Saturday June 26 2010

1pm-5pm

http://parentingpink.com/2010/06/self-esteem-ego-daughter/

Too Much Self-Esteem or An Overblown Ego? 3 Simple Tips for Developing Healthy Self-Acceptance in Your Daughter

for Developing Healthy Self-Acceptance in Your Daughter.

At 33, I can safely say that I have lived a life discovering ways to build up my own self -esteem. It is a conscious choice to make changes here and there and to live up to my potential. The journey has led to a healthy sense of self-acceptance, which in turn has increased my confidence. Along the way, I learned that I am not the only one to suffer from low self-esteem. This pandemic exists among even the highest of achievers. But recent research, studies and articles on “Generation Y” say that we have overindulged our children’s self-esteem to the point of narcissism. Whoa. Really?

Self-esteem is defined as confidence in your own merit as an individual person, which is markedly different from ego or an exaggerated sense of self-importance or superiority. A healthy sense of self-esteem is self-acceptance, which means accepting who you truly are. It is a commitment to living the best you. It is a constant evolution.

Those who come across as arrogant or egotistical may actually have very little or very low self-esteem. The façade of the inflated and privileged demeanor actually masks a very self-conscious individual. So, it is important that we help out children develop high self-esteem by way of self-acceptance rather than ego. Here are 3 simple tips:

1. Be real with your praise.

Egotistic and narcissistic girls are a result of a constant “fluff and puff praise.” Your child’s sense of self-acceptance comes from praise that is specific and real. Praise your daughter for her efforts in all endeavors, but be real and specific with the things at which she actually excels. Be specific when encouraging her greatness, her beauty and her talents. We all have uniqueness within us and our gifts, talents and purpose. Praise, affirm and mold opportunities for your daughter rather than pumping her up with a false sense of worth in all aspects of her life.

2. Teach your daughter the value of service.

True self-acceptance will show outwardly in the form of “service”. When children have truly embraced their unique gifts and strengths, they will naturally turn to positively affecting the lives of others, which in turn boosts their confidence even further. It is important that parents establish a strong foundation of core values while instilling self-worth.

3. Spend quality time with your daughter.

Kids seem to have the latest and greatest of every toy, book and technology, even before it hits the shelf. It seems to be a way of occupying them so that we can carry on our busy lives without feeling guilty that we have not spent proper quality time with them. It is no wonder they come across with a sense of entitlement. Material possessions and a lack of structure have replaced the very important need for quality time. We must reinstate quality time because it is during this time in which we can teach values, build character and lead by example.

Remember: The backlash of “too much self-esteem” is inaccurately categorized. When in the presence of a child who comes across egotistical and narcissistic, an adult must ask him or herself, “Is this child being her true self? Do her actions demonstrate self-acceptance?”

Self-acceptance will help your daughter live her true self. It involves constant self-evaluation and self-improvement of the gifts she brings and the purpose she needs to pursue. It is a confidence and commitment to living her highest potential.

I guarantee you can spot the difference.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Leanne Power is an entrepreneur and mother of one. Her new book, “You Are Sooooo Beautiful: Empowering Self-Esteem for Ages 4-104,” aims to teach children (and adults!) about the unique qualities in each of us. More information on Leanne and the book can be found at: www.YouAreSoooooBeautiful.com.